Im hoping stories like this are allowed here. I feel the need to process my feelings through words, so that I can try and do better in the future.

I was planning on meeting a daddy for coffee and lunch today. We had been talking all week after I posted something on r/abdlpersonals and I thought we really hit it off. I had posted about looking for friends and potentially a caretaker but I guess I should have been more forthcoming.

I would describe myself as heteroflexible, as in I’m mostly attracted to women but I think in most circumstances, particularly as a little, I can give love to everyone. But even then, the sexual aspects of my life aren’t even that important to me. And if I never had sex in my life as a little, that would be fine with me. I was truly interested in a legitimate caretaker type, regardless of gender.

A little into the conversations with this daddy type, this topic of conversation came up, and I was honest that although I wasn’t sexually attracted to him, I could make a pure big/little relationship work, and even talked about a more poly relationship with a mommy involved. He seemed fine with this and we continued to chat, looking forward to meeting up Saturday.

When the time came, he ghosted me, deleted the accounts or blocked me from where we were talking. And although this thing has happened before in more vanilla situations, I still always find myself confused by it all. Did I push things along too quickly? Were our wants and needs just not made clear enough for each other? It could have been any number of things, and if you end up reading this, whatever it was, I’m sorry.

But such is life. It’s so difficult to meet people in this lifestyle, let alone find deeper more intimate relationships, and it’s discouraging when things like this happen. But I’ll keep trying. I think the lesson learned for me is to, from the get go, make things as clear as possible. That won’t eliminate all hurdles to making a friendship or relationship work and it also threatens to stifle the flow of conversation early, but I guess that’s the price of admission to finding true companionship in this kind of lifestyle.

Let me know your thoughts or advice on this. Truly looking to learn and grow from this experience.