I want to know how you look back on your childhood. I get the urge to not connote ABDL with mental disorders for optics, but ABDL seems to link strongly with BPD, OCD, Anxiety, Mood Disorders like Depression and Bipolar, ADHD and Autism. Seeing how intertwined these conditions are with trauma and how ABDL and regression seems to help with them, I wonder if childhood neglect plays a role in the development of infantilism.

Here's my story:

Before starting grade five my father was largely absent and my mother was aloof, despite being somewhat caring when she felt like it. I sought emotional support from friends and didn't expect it from my parents. When I think about my fetishes and fixations, I notice that they always revolve around protection: Gloves, Gas Masks, Rubber Boots, Diapers and so on. I believe that stems from not having felt a parent or educator worry about me when I was a child. I was also not comforted, instead I was questioned why I felt things in the first place. Most people who know me on a private level perceive me as warm and emotional, though I present with a stern façade. Which is reflected in my use of language as I am told. I was not abused as much with beatings and yellings, though that occurred as well, I was emotionally discarded. My parents did everything for my health, I was breastfed until I was three, I was taken to the doctor regularly and had a supreme diet. Both of my parents were high achievers academically, having attended the best schools around the world, and saw life as an equation to be solved. Succinctly, I was brought up in a way that forbade the display of feelings. There is even worse stuff that happened in my teens, but my fixation on protection predates that. Today, there is nothing I crave more than being cradled.