I'm slowly trying to get back into the ABDL community, whether in person and local or online on fetlife, reddit and maybe eventually tumblr; an endeavor that's consistently let me down time and time again, am I insane for trying again? Why must I have a love, appreciation and longing for a relationship with a community of people who's left me feeling alienated? People who are all to familiar with feeling apart from the rest of the rest of the world we're amongst.

Previously being a highly energetic and eager extrovert, it seems so surprisingly difficult to establish friends with anyone in this community; you'd think with a scarce amount of ABDL "friendlies" local to this state let alone the scarce active population online, it'd be easy or natural given the common ground. Maybe I come off as a "try hard"? Is it my eager friendiness and thoughtfulness? I don't immediately try to turn the subject of the conversation to some creepy and overly described fetish fantasty. I respectfully keep everything vanilla with a little bit of ABDL references sprinkled in where appropriate. Regardless, without fail, I seem to fail at my ability to be able to truly connect with anyone on a personal level let alone friendly. It's mind-maddeningly discouraging and feels impossible to resonate with others especially when you feel your existence is taken for granted (in general). I want to give up and toss in the towel but I've been dying to be apart of this community since it's numbers consisted of small clusters of groups of a couple hundred people each, piled into html pages dedicated to online chat rooms or forums. Any advice, tips, tricks and specific groups to join and become apart of? I've tried local little meets and munches but I'm lucky if maybe 15 people show up.