I dunno, I’ve been consistently feeling mentally fucked for the past 4 years or so now and in all honesty I’m probably gonna end up killing myself at some point in the new year, so I dunno, I guess I’m just kinda in the mood for a dark and dirty sex chat. I’d go out and try to have some real casual sex, but all that shit just doesn’t work for me. My social brain seems to be a bit fucked, so friendships, relationships, even one night stands, they all just make me feel more alone and fucking hollow. There has only ever been one person who didn’t make me feel more alone, but I fell in love with her like a fucking idiot and she rejected me, and then I kept being my miserable piece of shit self and I guess she ultimately decided she’s happier without me as a friend now cause she has completely shut me out for the past 3 years. So yeah, guess that’s why I figured I’d come here and just try to work through some of this nihilistic horniness with a sex chat instead, cause it’s about all I can seem to manage.

Anyway, when I’m feeling like this, I just get really fucking turned on from being sexually corrupted by kinky girls. I kinda ended up losing virginity to rape cause one night when I got so fucked up at after work drinks that I blacked out and got woken up in a gutter by a cop, who took me to hospital where I was quickly discharged, and when asked the work group chat to see if they could fill in the blanks, she kinda invited herself to come pick me up take me back to her place and fuck me when I couldn’t tell her not to. So I dunno, as fucked up as it is, I guess I get kinda turned on from the thought of being used for a girl’s pleasure somehow, and I get really hard over fantasies that involve her wanting me to engage in some kind of messed up sex act for her because she wants it so fucking badly. It can be stuff she wants us to do together, or even something else like me to have my first bi experience or something by making me mess around with another guy or a femboy or something in a MMF threesome. Basically just looking for something that involves a feeling of wrongness and sexual corruption.

So yeah, I dunno, if any of that sounds like something you’d be into, let me know.