Just sharing some things on my mind. I don't know what it is about me, but I ABSOLUTELY refuse to be dealt with in certain ways. That has legitimate implications for my life, I've had to turn down a lot of people over the years and still have to do so. But I will NEVER settle or compromise. I have extremely high standards and if that means I never get married, or I die a virgin, I am more than comfortable with that. I prefer to be single than to be with any person that doesn't meet or rise to my standards. I prefer to retain my virginity than to offer myself to any man uninterested or unable to approach me properly as a woman and wife-to-be. Im not religious, but don't fucking dare for one moment to put a singular finger on my body without pure, unselfish, husbandly intent. I would honestly rather be my own woman and take care of myself, than to be with ANY man who doesn't take care of me, and I say this all with total passion and conviction.

There have been so many times I'm with a guy and they do something and all i can think is "my husband would never do this". My husband would never belittle or verbally abuse me. My husband wouldnt have any hesitance about waiting for me. My husband wouldnt have any scorn for my vulnerability. My husband would not feel anything less than fulfillment and pleasure at providing for me and catering to my needs, wants and feelings. My husband would never be able to harm me or do me wrong. I need someone who will bear with me right now, I'm in one of the most difficult stages of my life for the next 2 years. I'm undertaking a hell of a lot, in a very difficult and restrictive set of circumstances. I require intense patience, gentleness and persistence. I need someone I can trust with myself, with my body and with my life, even at the hardest stage of my life. If you're not there for me at my darkest hour, believe me when I say I won't want you there at all at my brightest. I won't want anyone, I'd have done it all myself at that point. So if my future husband is out there at all, step up and claim me soon or forever hold your peace. And I mean that with every fiber of my being.