Just putting this here bc I doubt anyone will read this, and doubt even less somehow that anyone cares.

Recently moved for grad school and I just feel so lonely. No friends here. Still learning my way around. But, I had all these hopes and dreams of hooking up, meeting guys, and finally sexually exploring. And I haven't been able to do that. Met with one dude once, and I mainly wanted to cuddle. He just wanted a nut, so we found a compromise, but we haven't met up since. He finally mentioned meeting up when I started asking questions about fucking, but that was only bc I'm still new to anal. And seeing as to how he "only does raw" looks like we'll probably never meet up again, which is fine. Just mad at myself. Met the dude and he asked about my kinks. I opened up and mentioned how I'm just starting to explore, and he said I could explore with him. That was weeks ago. I tried the whole "ask for what you want" thing. That only led to him basically saying that he'll let me know when he's free. Which I take to mean he doesn't really want to hang out or meet up. Which is fine...just say that.

Also, the guys here, the ones that I've seen around my age and a little older all look thin, fit, buff, or somewhere in between. And I feel like I just stand out as a non skinny, guy. Ugh fat, chubby dude. Even the other Black guys I've met look like they work out.

I just feel unattractive and undesirable. I want to sexually explore, but have no one to explore with. It'd be nice to do that with a guy who has experience. But...yeah. Feeling pretty sucky.

I also wish I could post shit like this on my freak twitter and idk get some encouragement or tips. But only responses are when I tweet, retweet or comment on sex shit.

Alright, that's about it. Let's see if things get better...