I behold my form, the vessel I inhabit, I despise the roots of it's blood.

Around it goes the madness in my brain, I fall further into delusion, but I wield it as a weapon, this devil is mine, no one else's, and I'll make it suffer if I have to.

I lost my notions of personal space as those around slowly eroded it, hedonistic monuments of their lack of perspective, they intoxicate their minds on purpose, and fire is set in the home they declare they care about and all it is are lies, deceit, they're accostumed to the confort of a family but they do not cherish it, they merely use is a mask, the bare minimum to function, I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it.

I made a case to be truthful, to always uphold who I am with honesty, even if an ugly truth lies underneath, I'll not run from it, those around me were the ones who couldn't control their shadows, I cannot blame them, but my life has been nothing but the inconsequential actions of those who were supposed to be my support shaping my nights of sleep, I lost my ability to cry for each time I would, they would punish me for it, so I laugh again and again at this misery.

I can't stand looking at the disgusting figure who is supposed to be my mother, the petty and incongruent entity she becomes, someone beyond salvation, someone beyond anything I could say or do, a monument of sin incarnate.

I NEVER, had a family, I still don't do and It seems I'll even fail at building one myself.

If anything, what I can do to break the cycle is just fucking dying.