I really don’t know what to do. My dad has always been verbally, mentally, and sometimes physically abusive, but I’ve reached my breaking point

He always calls me(15 yo)fat, tells me I’m stupid, will hit me when he gets mad, pushes me around, and is just an overall ass to me. He also calls me pathetic when I cry

As per quarantine, I stay inside all day(like I’m supposed to). I don’t have that many chores during the day so most of the time I’m just in my room doing whatever. Sounds normal right?

Well he has problem with that. But he doesn’t have a problem with my older sister staying out all night, not doing anything around the house, even when she wasn’t an adult.

But he has a problem with me being a normal teenager. I’m now no longer allowed to be in my room.

I can’t call my boyfriend before he works for 10 hours, can’t draw, can’t practice, can’t do my homework in peace. Even when I have absolutely no other purpose around the house, I’m not allowed to be in my room. I literally try to go to the bathroom or take care of my gecko and he accuses me of trying to “find a loophole”

So anyway, tomorrow I’m getting a gym membership. I love going to the gym, I enjoy losing weight, which I am, and I would have no problem with it if he wasn’t always telling me I’m fat.

So he tells me I’m gonna be doing I’m own paperwork. Now things like paperwork and adult things give me anxiety. Idk why, just happens.

Keep in mind I’m 15. I was like man, I don’t wanna do paperwork, and he says you’re pretty much an adult. And I’m like no I’m not I’m 15.

So he says, “you’re basically an adult.” And I thought he was gonna stop there, but no

He looks at me and says “it’s a shame, I thought we could’ve done better”

What the fuck. Why. Why would you say that to your own 15 year old child.

I’ve already tried to commit suicide before because of his shit, but that didn’t end well since they didn’t care and just beat me and took away everything that made me happy.

But like, why? I’m a straight A student, I’m taking all college classes. I’m doing extracurriculars. I do all my chores. I don’t vape or have sex or do drugs. I just like being alone sometimes

What did I do wrong? Why does he hate me so much?

I feel like I’m just not good enough. And honestly I’m really close to throwing myself in front of a car.

So yeah that shits not even half of all he’s done. Am I the one in the wrong?