As the title states: I (49F) am wondering how I can find/meet a man practicing or interested in tantra and tantric sex. I’m in Belgium.

Some background might be good.

Whole my life traditional sex had always felt off. Too much, too rough, way too fast and way too focused on genitals and orgasm.

I’ve always felt ‘incomplete’ and even broken when it’s about sex! I always miss that deeper connection, the broader approach to sex.
All men (also women) around me I so focused on genitals and orgasm and this doesn’t get me ticking at all!!

The rare occasion that was fulfilling it was when me and my partner took our time, it wasn’t even about foreplay, it started waaay sooner. I call it the prelude to sex. It started with gazing, touching, sharing experiences, laughing, … you know that energy that is present in the very early stages of a relationship. You flirt, fool around … climbing the ladder of pleasure while connecting.

Problem I encounter in most heterosexual couples… after a while sex is a sex… mechanical, short, outcome centric and I lose all interest! Traditional sex doesn’t arouse me at all!!

All my partners and men I’ve dated said the same: you are broken, you are too difficult too please.

I was never able to ‘convince’ a man/partner to slow down or practice tantric sex. They all find it too long, too ‘fluffy’ and want PIV sooner than later!

Traditional sex led to a big decrease in libido. Simple I don’t want traditional sex anymore! I don’t get aroused.

And before you make any conclusions… when arousal builds slowly and connection is deep… oooh boy I transform in a thirsty nymph ☺️

Now I wonder where or how can I find men wanting or practicing tantric sex. Up till now all men I meet want traditional sex and I’m done with that! I’d rather have no sew than traditional sex