So it's been about two weeks since I've posted here, and I want to thank everyone who commented and messaged me, thank you so much for the support. I tried to respond to most of the messages if I didn't get back to you, sorry I'm working on getting better at this kind of thing. Since I first posted I have gone to karaoke 3 times, been to two concerts; the offspring show and a local show, I even got invited to the after party for the local show. I think I may have made some connections so long as I keep going to the same places for karaoke and local music. So, so far so good. However, while I realize that I wasn't going to fix myself, my situation or my issues overnight I have decided I need professional help for what I think may be serious underlying problems that require medical professionals and medication as recommended. I had my first appointment today and the doctor is going to decide if I need medication for depression and ADHD. I will also start counseling this week. Im passing this on as a PSA to get help sooner rather than later. I have felt terrible for years and I think that everything has boiled over lately because of my unwillingness to deal with my situation and depression for a long time.

Again, thanks for your support and don't put off getting help, just go see the damn doc!