I’m the most neurotic guy I know. I’m always planning and working around the worst possible outcome and situations. My girlfriend thinks it’s insane. I’m obsessed with avoiding personal failure to the point there’s times I struggle to be in the moment because I’m so wrapped up in my own head about it. Everything has to be done perfectly correctly. I have to be bang on time for everything. I pace around my room in circles when it’s bad. I walk around with this sick feeling in my chest all the time it drives me insane!

How do you beat it? I can’t bring myself to go to therapy it seems like such a waste of time (at least talk therapy idk) and talking about it to people in my life outside my gf gets little beyond confusion and raised eyebrows. I just want to be normal and to not feel like I’m being hunted for sport every time I go to a party where I don’t know everyone. Everything feels like a huge performance and I’m hyper aware of everything I say and every movement I make. I’m lucky I present normally so this is all internal but I’m a 25 year old man holy shit what is wrong with me?