I've been lurking for a bit, commenting here and there and figured this was a good time for introductions. I was not RBN personally, but I married into a crazy boat full of Ns and reading stories here helps me both manage my expectations and strategize how I behave.

So for our cast we have my husband, his sister (SIL), his mother (N/Flea?MIL), biodad (now deceased), MIL's husband (Estepdad) and THEN there's the next generation. Biodad's family is chock full of Ns with a matriarchal Ngrandma, Egrandpa, Nsons. Within this dynamic, my Nmil was the scapegoat, biodad was one of the GCs.

Her family is no better. NMIL was likely the GC for her own parents, but of her -siblings- she is the scapegoat. I still don't know all of the siblings despite having been married into this ridiculous family for 8 years.

My husband and his sister are -blessedly- wonderful people. Husband's father was sick through most of their lives and nMIL worked two if not three jobs to cover bills so he could have care. There is a large age gap between husband and SIL so he was responsible for home care for his father (until he degraded enough from illness to go into a nursing home) and raising his sister. Husband left and went -far- away for college.

Some stories:
I mentioned MIL working multiple jobs. These were advanced degree jobs in the medical field, she teaches in her field and also provides care. Her BILs would come over to the house and go through her mail because they were convinced she was leeching off of her husband (biodad) because there was no way she could afford the house they were living in.

When husband was younger, biodad cheated on MIL. His family far preferred the mistress and would cover for him when nMIL inquired to his whereabouts. He got his diagnosis shortly after and she refused to leave him because they would claim that she left him because he got sick, not because of the cheating.

One of biodad's brothers (a FLEA, if not Nuncle) and his wife got super mad at MIL for naming SIL what she did because THEY wanted to name a girl that name. They only had boys. MIL was the only one who birthed a girl in the family. This has actually continued, much to my perverse pleasure. All of Ngrandma's grandchildren have had boys except for my husband. I am currently pregnant with our second girl. I suspect Ngrandma wanted a girl in the family to GC but never did so she made do with the boys. She has never met my children and never will.

When biodad's disease had progressed to the point where they were only ameliorating pain, rather than trying to treat, NGma visited him at the home. We were under strict orders to only give him water sponges since he could choke on anything thicker, forget solids. She tried to feed him corn chowder.

After Biodead's death, NGma invited the mistress to the wake/funeral and showered her with affection while ignoring NMIL, the actual widow. There was a visible divide in the wake at the funeral home of MIL supporters and NGrandma's supporters. NUncles (biodad's brothers) tried to take home the flowers from the funeral that were from people they knew, despite them being for biodad.

Husband, SIL and I went to confront Ngrandma about her terrible treatment of MIL. She tried to claim that MIL gave biodad his disease (impossible) and was responsible for his death. Husband got quite irate and yelled at her, telling her she was the one who could have killed him when she fed him soup. She tried to gaslight me because of a mixup in thankyou notes after our wedding, we shut that down too, it was irrelevant. It was the last time we communicated. NMIL went LC (they live in the same town so it was possible to run into each other).

This has reached max word count, so if I'm to share anymore I might have to share in comments!