My wife has been dating this man for over a year, beginning in Oct 2022. He is also poly, and had girlfriends apart from my wife at the time. Things were going very well. She would spend one night a week over at his house (we both work and have kids, been tough balancing that work/life thing). They also had daily phone calls of over an hour. Some holidays we would all get together either at his house or ours. We'd have movie nights.

About 6 months ago, he started dating a coworker of his. She was in an abusive marriage. She slept around on her husband, but does not consider herself poly. For the first 4 months, everything was fine. My wife still had her one night a week with him, we'd do a movie night here and there, she'd still get her daily calls.

Then this past December it all changed. Out of nowhere, his girlfriend (who had just left her husband/not quite divorced) moved in with him. And suddenly my wife wasn't able to see him. Every week there would be a new excuse of why their night had to be canceled. Some were legit; weather, illness, etc. But most of the time it was because new girlfriend needed him for something.

My wife had wanted to be collared, and he gave her one for Christmas. But there was no ceremony behind it, more like an after thought. And she still barely saw him, maybe one 5 min phone call twice a week.

For two months this went on, until last night. My wife was invited to have dinner with him and his new girlfriend. Wife wanted to discuss the future, laying out her expectations. Instead girlfriend yelled at wife and boyfriend did nothing. Wife had enough, gave him back his collar, and came home crying.

To be clear, before she had moved in, wife and boyfriend had discussed the possibility of girlfriend moving in eventually. Wife was fine with this, she just wanted to make sure she still had her one night a week and her phone calls. Instead, she moved in without wife being told, phone calls all but stopped, date night continually cancelled.

Girlfriend has stated she is not poly. Boyfriend seems to think he can convince her. The whole thing seems doomed. And I'm tired of seeing my wife crying every night this past 2 months. I haven't said anything to him, it wasn't my relationship. But I really want to punch him in the face for the emotional abuse he has done to my wife.

No advice needed. Just wanted to vent.