It is the first thing I look for in the morning and the last thing I interact with before sleep. It is not my best friend, soulmate, or favourite picture of a loved one. The thing I refer to is my phone. My phone has become an essential item in my life. I wake up looking for it, and I sleep after having a fair share of screen time on it. It has become my primary source of dopamine throughout the day. Yes, I still enjoy food, and I still enjoy socializing with my friends, but the moment both of these activities are absent (which is most of the time), I end up using my phone. It is usually a battle of looking into the perfect content, and that for me is mildly complex content where I can consume little energy but not too little that I get bored. It is the addiction to this content that kept me sane but addicted. I have grown accustomed to relying on my phone to escape loneliness boredom, alleviate stress during difficult times, and distract myself during waiting times. It is the magical device that keeps me from going out of bed for a few hours and keeps me company before sleep. My phone became my resting buddy during my sickness when no one was by my side. My relationship with my phone is complicated to explain. I know that this magical device has helped me keep in touch with people, but it has also alienated me from others. It has helped me communicate with my workmates and distracted me from keeping in touch with my family regularly. It is the only thing I keep using for a quarter of my day. After sleeping, I think using my phone is the most time-consuming activity. If I am to describe when and how I use my phone, I would say every time I feel bored, lonely, tired, lustful, happy, and sad. It is the device I rely on to play games, consume Instagram content, look up information, and generally find out new things to get distracted. My phone is always by my side. It is silent yet is checked every 10 minutes on average. It is scary to fathom the amount of time I spend on my phone. So far the apps I use most of my time when using my phones are Instagram and WhatsApp. It is crazy how much Instagram reel and Whatsapp chats have taken over hours every day. I could have used hours to develop a new skill, learn a new language, or discover a new hobby. Generally, my phone usage is correlated to my overly lazy personality. I always choose the path with the least obstacles for a short time. This usmost minor cost me relationships, money, and life experiences. I have become a sickly person with the energy of anything but 25 years old. I cannot understand which factor impacted which. Is it my phone usage that drove me to develop a lazy, uninspired lifestyle filled with unhealthy and time-inefficient decisions, or the other way around? All I know is that I have been stuck in this loop for quite some time. I mainly add and remove things to maintain the balance without pushing things to the edge where I will have to sacrifice this null lifestyle. With all this mess in mind, I have strived slowly to change. I started watching videos about productivity, time management, and dieting, among many other self-, among contents. I always believe that knowledge might come in handy once I pull myself together and start changing. However, with less than 12 hours on my hand and half of which is gone on Instagram, I am left surviving with the bare minimum and barely managing to do the tasks assigned to me at work. Add to the mix an overly jealous gf, and I am up to my neck with stuff. I am suffocating and suffering from a lack of time and a dull, unhealthy lifestyle while spending hours consuming social media and eating overly priced junk food.