I was ingame kanina and while streaming, I play music para good yung flow ng game ko. I was playing a Maki playlist and biglang nag play sa song na "HBD". I don't hate the song but I usually skip it kasi it reminds me of things I don't wanna think about. I couldn't skip the song kasi nasa game ako so I just listened to it. As much as I can, ayoko takasan yung emotions ko- whether it be the negative ones. I'm trying to sit with it, and process stuff until I get the professional help I need.

I got reminded of one tiktok video that said na a couple will surely start dating once they began talking near one's birthday. I get reminded everytime that my ex's birthday is coming up, and that he gets to spend it with the person he cheated on me with twice. Last year and this year as well.

nanalo kami sa game kanina pero feeling ko natalo ako ng malala sa love hahahahuhuhu.

p.s: 'di ako nag fifish ng sympathy, I just wanna vent. Tsaka I am processing a lot of internal things kaya I put it here sa reddit to fish for good input.