She’s been dating a guy for two years and, in that time, went from regularly calling me (30M) up two to three times a week to chat for hours to barely texting. Yeah, we started video calling for an hour once a week last month, but I’m still iffed by the whole thing.

Anyway, what really drives me up a wall about their relationship is how into him she is. It honestly makes me unreasonably jealous to see her gush about how in shape and attractive he is, and I feel so immature taking solace in the fact that he’s very clearly balding while I’m not. Idk, it triggers my body dysmorphia and brought up some baggage between me and her since I used to be interested in her and she friendzoned me hard. But then, in the weeks leading up to her getting asked out by him, she genuinely seemed to have changed and taken an interest in me. Now I can’t help but wonder if she’s keeping me on a lifeline incase she leaves him.

So yeah, now I hope she’s secretly unhappy with him. There have been hints she could be; the mention that she won’t be getting married for at least five years since he’s in law school (which she sounded disappointed in), the way she still runs to me whenever something is wrong unprompted (which is almost the only time she texts first other than to confirm we’ll do our FaceTime call), and some very sweet comments she made about how much I’ve grown as a person recently when we hung out to catch up in person.

I feel pretty shitty/petty about it but eh. What’re you gonna do, you know?