I’m about to make you the worst offer that’s ever been made to any woman ever. It’s so bad. I have to make so I’m in Denver now. friend of mine gave me a little blow if you want to say hi trust me me that’s all your going to wanna do in my car it is a nice black Mercedes SUV that’s filthy as fuck from the mud. I’ve been driving through. I left my buddies house ripped my pants. He’s as big as a house so I’m wearing, a pair of his daughters jeans with flare bottoms I mean, I do look good in them seriously guaranteed to make the worst first impression ever known to humankind and i will never show my face again because I’m embarrassed as fuck. I gotta stop and get gas and get out of these fucking things so you do have that going for you lol this is fucking ridiculous. You seriously have to be fucking warped to accept it but it’s such a fuck fucked up offer. I had to make it lol hope you have a wonderful evening

It did get worse——It was so much worse had to stop and get gas. Had to stop by the store. I don’t live anywhere nearby I actually found the whole thing hilarious and nobody knows me there so when I did get out, I had to pretend to own it. I was at the 7-Eleven for a second to get out of my car 7 police cars pull up into the parking lot the cop tells me to get back to your car. I’m blocked. I’m thinking great. I’m going to jail like this fuck actually. Some guy had passed out in his car. I finally get out go to the 7-Eleven probably 30 people now admiring my pants. I owned it but cool man old-school hippie yeah love you bellbottoms my dick. My balls are sticking out like 70s rock musician in tight jeans and bellbottoms.