I’m at a forced crossroads and wondering what what you do fellow limerent? I’ve been in a limerent friendship for 4 years , we’re both married and work together. Trust me, we are not having an affair. My LO claims he has OCPD which is one of the worst personality disorders, incredibly avoidant, aggressively hot/cold, perfectionist, and controlling. But he’s also charming, incredibly hard working, great cook, great conversationslist, a wonder to know. I really love him actually, even though he’s been a disappointment bc of his rigidity and neither of us are actually availble to each utter. Anyway, the mind doesn’t care that he’s not availble, the mind just can’t get enough of his company and validation.

So getting to the question… we were having lunch last week and I asked him what was new with him at the beginning of the lunch and he sorta downplayed anything. At the way end of the meal he reveals that he is switching to nights for the next month bc they are paying $35 extra per hour. I don’t take that personally, it’s an extra $1200 per week which is pretty great for most people. I didn’t share with him at that time that I’ve been planning on putting in my notice August as I have a better opportunity waiting for me too with a lot less stress. I’ve had such a dopamine high from this situation for so long but no payoff beyond receiving lots of compliments and great movie/tv recommendations. I’ve had a chance to consider an affair, I mean get real close to the boundary but we never did it. So his first night of work is tonight and I won’t see him for a month. I can text but he’s not a close friend outside of work, he’s hot/cold.

When do I tell him I’m leaving? How? Do I email? Do I not say anything at all? Do I block him? Do delete his phone number and email? Luckily he’s not on social media so I don’t have to worry about that. I guess there’s a small chance that I might see him in August, depending on when he flips back to days. How does one proceed? Thanks!