Hey folks, brand new to this so here it goes.

7 years my top bf and I have been together, for quite a long time we have talked about threesomes and cucking and have in the past explored both through hookups, chats and cruising.

Generally we are great. When we are not in the ‘cuck’ head space, I feel hot and twinky, and am very confidant and happy in my identity as a 24 year old twink bottom. However, the cucking kink inside of me bubbles up every so often, steering our sexual practice into more kinky and extreme directions, including cucking.

My partner and I practice seeking out other hot bottoms for him via Grindr or X, often chatting then adding them on SC to keep conversing.

The pattern that usually occurs is us diving into the cucking theme pretty hard, a wave I thoroughly enjoy riding when in the thick of it, I believe it allows me to acknowledge my own insecurities and utilise them by sexualising them through a cuckold theme. However the complications usually come with the ‘post cum clarity’ when we finish, often leaving me lingering in a headspace of awkwardness and embarrassment with my partner. Often reducing myself to silence cause I’m so embarrassed at how much I’ve allowed myself to be degraded and feeling very strange, conflicted or worried at any conversation ignited by ‘bottom bulls’ that we may have connected with.

The themes within the conversations range from bullying and degrading my appearance through comparing and contrasting me with the other boy, physical humiliation and being ignored, bound or jerking alone while my bf chats to other boys, or conversations regarding him leaving me and replacing me with another boy, Which really scratchs the cucking itch in my head and my cock.

For the past while, I’ve been trying to figure out mentally how to cope in a healthy way with the ‘transitional phase’ between these two polar extremes, from wanting to be treated like a hot bottom by my partner and others, to wanting to be treated like the lowest of low cucks, humiliated, bullied and degraded. I find it difficult to shift in and out of these two alternating headspaces, often blurring the line or causing friction between my partner and I, and causing me some real jealousy and self esteem issues, despite both my unwavering trust in my partner, and otherwise general self confidence. I know that there is a way to practice this both effectively and safely for us both, and recently have been wanting to figure that out.

If there are any practicing couples or bottoms interested in being cucked here it would be great to hear how you deal with these themes with your partners in a healthy constructive way. As I’ve been feeling this for years and have had some very hot and horny play with my partner regarding it, I know that this can be done properly and be good for us.