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I never had bad bottom dysphoria, but ever since getting in a relationship with my partner it's something that happens more often. My partner is amab and they are amazing, I love them so much and they are so understanding; but they also really like dick, like getting fucked or giving head. We sometimes go have group sex with other people, so far it's mostly been with other transfems and people with penises. Every time I'm excited to go, but when we get there and things start to happen, I start to get dysphoria and kinda stressed. I see all the things that they can do and I feel like the odd one out, like I'm not as attractive to the people we are hanging out with, like I'm inadequate. I see my partner having fun in a way, that I feel, I can never give them, I can't fuck their throat, I can't cum in their ass, I can't fuck them in the way that I want. Toys are really cool and we use them a lot, we have good sex that I'm a big fan of, but usually when we go to do stuff with other people, I'm just flooded with anxiety and dysphoria. I work through it so that I have fun too, but sometimes it's just jeiwjwskurhwhuriwjsb.
My partner says I need to not focus on the things I can't do and focus on what I can, but I just can't help it, I can't help but think about the fact I don't have a penis. I know that the people we hangout with don't care, I know of my partner doesn't care, but I just feel bad.
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- 1 year ago
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