I literally cannot stop thinking about this... I feel the need to be a dad and a husband so strongly that it's overwhelming me. It's like my future kids need to be born and are urging me to create them. It's like they're craving to be loved by me and love me back. I'm constantly imagining taking care of our little ones together with my beloved wife. Seeing them grow up into adorable little toddlers happily running around everywhere. Hugging them tightly and playing with them all the time. Living through and cherishing everything amazing about them - their first teeth, their first steps, their first words, their first day of school... Hearing them call me "daddy" for the first time, making my heart explode! Hearing them say that they love me just so that I could return those words to them, accompanied with a deep, loving kiss on their foreheads. Oh dear... my beloved kids... my little darlings... I need them! I can't live without them! I feel that they've already conquered my heart even before they are born.

Not having a wife and children is becoming so painful... I feel that there is something missing on my ring finger - something which I'd never, ever want to remove. Something which my dearest would deeply enjoy kissing passionately, which I'd love to reciprocate back to her. Something which would indicate our inseparable physical and emotional bond. The lack of a ring indicating my lifelong commitment to her makes me feel like there is a gaping hole in my heart which can only be filled with the laughter of my daughters and sons and the loving touch and grasp of my beloved partner in life. I feel the need to expose my ailing heart to her so that she could fill that void with her affection and dedication, which I'd so eagerly reciprocate. Our bodies and hearts and minds would become one, never to be broken apart. Our feelings for each other would be pure and unconditional and wholesome in a manner only matched by our shared feelings for our gorgeous little angels.

I don't even know why I want a family so badly. I know that it won't always be easy. I know that I'd have to work hard to raise my kids. I know that I'd sometimes be stressed and burnt out and disappointed and that I'd have to go through unpleasant things. I know that I might not always get on with my wife and that sometimes we might treat each other in a less than loving manner. Nevertheless, my body and heart are desperately craving all of this. That's why I'm becoming more and more certain that I won't be able to find true happiness until I'm married with children.