I dislike so much these days. Everything is bland, muted, everyone is uninteresting and shallow. The world is so ugly, so grayscale. Every action, every worry, every effort all feels so pointless in hindsight. I isolate myself constantly, only in solitude do I feel safe and relaxed, but then at the same time profoundly lonely. Days march on, each a near replica of the previous, except somehow worse. I look in the mirror at someone who looks back with the same dead eyes, the same unkempt hair and facial hair, the same broken sense of identity. Dates on the calendar of some importance are coming up soon, and I feel like I couldn't care less. I fantasize about getting in my car and driving west, with no particular destination in mind except away from here. Everything is wrong. Everything sucks. Everything is stupid.