The last two people I asked out declined due to my gender and age. I asked out a bi man and bi lady, they were very nice about it but both said gender and age were factors (I am about 20 years older) in their decision.

I obviously respect their decisions and boundaries. However, I'm puzzled as to why age is such a big deal for a lot of people. I've never cared about occupation/SES/education/gender/age disparity in my relationships or friendships. (My biggest age gap was 13 years, I had a gf 6 years younger who earned more than twice my salary.) If it works, it works.

I just generally want to know the reasons. Like for myself, I never want kids as I come from an abusive background and have done enough child-rearing for lifetimes. I'm open about this and will happily discuss this as well as respect your preferences. (we all have them)

Is it the usual "life experiences are too different, maturity, earning potential" arguments? I ask with the genuine intention to learn, not to disrespect anyone.

We all have dealbreakers and hard/soft limits, but I feel that we can learn and grow if we are willing to discuss them.

​

​

​

​