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I feel incredibly guilty right now. I told a small semi-lie to my wonderful, loving, patient and caring BF (Ron). Recently, we've been talking about the lack of time spent together and how I've felt a bit like an after thought. We're in a poly dynamic where he has another GF as well, we all know each other and all hangout. Needless to say the convos have been emotional.
He left his wallet at my house and went over to his other GF (Jenny), he asked if I could drop it off. At that point I was kinda upset, it sunk how little time we'd been spending and wanted some privacy with him to discuss.
My roommate (Lucy, and best friend of 17 years) said "no have him come here, tell him I need your help with something" , he said sure but he'd be awhile. Due to my anxiety I decided to tell him she no longer needed my help and I headed over.
We talked and after he took me out to get some food. He asked "Oh yeah what did Lucy need your help with?", I paused for a second and quickly said "cleaning the bathroom, we have guest coming over tonight / tomorrow." This is partially true. We cleaned the living space but left the bathrooms for tomorrow to clean (we do have guest coming over). I told him such and that her and I figured last minute we'd just do it today instead but then decided not to so I could have the convo with him quicker. I should've just told him "Oh no we were just tryna get you to come over" but instead I continued.
A little part of me is worried he knew I stretching things. Even though he was acting normal / very loving after. He just usually picks up on my emotions very easily and is in tune with me. I can't blame Lucy, I'm my own person and chose to do so. This is eating me up a little. I should've just asked for more privacy from the jump.
Yes, it's true we'd been cleaning. Yes, it's true she asked / needed my helping cleaning the bathroom. Yes, we did have guest coming over that night and the next; but no, it wasn't technically true that she needed my help right there and then. It was just we could've done it then
Should I confess all of this to him? If so how should I approach this. I love him so much, he's my first BF and first to tell me he loves me. I feel so stupid right now.
tldr: I told my bf a small white lie about cleaning and I'm wondering I should let it slide
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