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How do I comfort my inner child, when she doesn’t want to be comforted by me?
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My therapist and I have used Internal Family Systems as a way to work through things. We’ve gotten to a point where we’ve realized a lot of why I’m still struggling is from not feelings safe throughout my life. So my therapist gave me different resources to work on self soothing and being there for that part of myself. However, since then,my inner child has become more and more resistant to being comforted. I didn’t understand until I started exploring attachment theory and realized I’m a fearful avoidant. This makes a lot of sense because my mom was sexually abused as a child and was terrified of being a parent. I definitely picked up on her fear as a child and despite knowing she loved me very much, I never felt safe in the world.

I guess all this is to say, what methods have you found that help you soothe those parts and rebuild trust with yourself? Have you gotten to a point where you really do feel safe and secure in the world and like those parts of you aren’t terrified anymore.

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2 years ago