A long distance friend of mine who I loved dearly and felt was there for me, her life starting going downhill and I didn’t much care to live anymore so figured I’d give her everything before I die, max out all my cards ect and give it to her to have a better life. I paid all her bills got her anything she asked and then one day her grandmas car broke so with no transportation she lost her job, the grandma would just Uber but because my friends pay is so low in her state Uber would be having her lose money and make nothing. The grandma was also giving up and going to let them lose their apartment so I bought my friend a brand new car. (Spent maybe $30k on her and I’m not rich I was just financially stable and had credit cards and investments which I no longer have now) She came up with a plan for us. That we would get a place together live together adopt her siblings bassically have a life together and she started calling me her soulmate and tell me she loves me and sometimes we would call even tho she claims she hates calls with anyone except me. I started feeling different about life and wanted to live and have a life with her so I tried getting back on track financially. I’ve asked to be a couple but she only ever wants to be friends. Later on she started growing distant and went about seeking other people, I started feeling like I mean nothing to her even tho she is my life. I went back off track to try to rush the move so I won’t lose her I resigned from my job I’m moving out there with a new job awaiting I rushed bought myself a car so I can drive when I’m out there and she still tells me to get the exspensive 2bed 2 bath apartment but doesn’t really seem all too responsive to actually moving in together and a bit less responsive to me than before and someone we mutually talked to said she had some rich old guy the whole time even tho she told me a while back this guy was to marry someone in an arranged marriage and was sleeping around with other women as well as playing the future wife and that she was stopping talking to him. I feel a bit used and also now that she says she’s talking to some girl to date, it’s too late to back out of this move and I don’t really care to live anymore, I’m just here and even after all this, I’ll still do my best to make her life better and make up for all she went thru in life but I honestly wish I’ll fall dead out there. I’m alone and hurting and I’m love with someone that will never love me, I’ll never be good enough despite all I do and have done for her.