TLDR: Lame, suburban, married first-timers scheduled two threesomes in four days with fancy escorts. Lots of anticipation sex is leaving us anxious to get to next week’s sexcapades, so we’re using Reddit as a journal!

Well, here we are, a week out from something we never imagined would ever be possible: We are going to have a threesome. MFF, more specifically. Never in our wildest dreams did we imagine this is something we’d be doing, so we thought it would be fun to share our journey (as total newbies) with our fellow Redditors, get some last-minute advice, answer questions, then follow up after to let you all know how it went.

**********

We are writing this together on a joint throwaway account, and are happy to respond with one or both of our thoughts to your comments/questions/advice. We’ll give you the honest, dirty, hot, sticky truth.

For context, we are both in our late 30’s, with young kids and busy jobs. This is the second marriage for both of us, and while we have our share of life and work stress, we love the shit out of each other and have a truly outstanding sex life.We co-parent with our exes, and recently some shit went down with one of the exes and the kids have been with us full-time for the past few months. It had been a while since we had any time to ourselves, but last week we ended up with unexpected alone time while the kids were off with their other parents for the holidays.

**********

[HUSBAND] We had just dropped off kids and were driving around chatting. I’d sent my wife a triple penetration meme earlier that day, as you do, and I was playfully asking if she thought she’d be into trying to fit in multiple dicks. She was like “I could probably fit it, but I’ve never fantasized about multiple guys.” This led to her asking if I had any fantasies, and I kind of laughed and was like, “yeah, sure, I guess.” She pressed me on it and I was like, “DANGER DANGER. I can’t talk with you about this!” We are really very open about everything, so I eventually told her I always wondered what it would be like to have a threesome, specifically having two women go down on me at once and that the idea was hot.” She sat pondering for a moment. I could see her wheels turning and I wondered if I’d spoken too openly. To my utter shock and disbelief, she was like, “well, maybe we could do that.”

[WIFE] I’d fantasized about women and group sex before, but had never done either. You might say I’m an enthusiastic consumer of the girl-on-girl pornographic genre. I’ve had vivid dreams of Kim Kardashian going down on me in a stairwell - thanks, Kim! So after talking this out a bit, we did what any red-blooded Millennials would do and went straight to Reddit for more information.

[COUPLE] The more we poked around, the more we liked the idea of trying this out. We have lots of great sex, like, almost daily - sometimes multiple orgasms a day (that may only be impressive to other parents of young children). We also have a Sex Bucket List we’ve been working on for years. Everything from positions and location sex to peeing on each other. We’ve knocked off most of it, but hadn’t given it much attention lately. We’d been stressed as hell, and the more we talked about the idea of a threesome, the more fucking turned on we became.

After much discussion and reading How-To guides from our fellow Redditors - thank you very much! - we determined we should hire a high-end professional for our first experience. We don’t have the time or interest in hunting for Unicorns, we are not interested in exploring this with friends or co-workers, and we also felt there were a lot more potential emotional landmines for us with those options.

[HUSBAND] We did a lot of reading about the Swingers lifestyle, but to be honest, I am not ready to have another M in the mix. While my wife has fantasies about women, I do not currently have any fantasies about other men, and the idea of another guy banging my wife is still very disturbing to me.

[COUPLE] So we spent a couple of days after Christmas pretending to be internet research scientists, and having ridiculous amounts of inspired fantasy sex (12 times in 6 days) because we were both so fucking turned on by the prospect of this actually happening.We found a few escorts we liked, and made the huge step of actually contacting one. After talking it through, we decided WIFE would be the one to reach out and communicate with potential escorts, but that we would read and talk through everything together. Our goal was for this to be a totally collaborative, transparent process.

We stayed up late creating a burner email and phone number for the purpose of this transaction and sent the first message. We were both so giddy and nervous waiting for responses. It was deliciously distracting. Then…lo and behold, she messaged back the next morning. After the initial communication and starting the screening process, the person we were talking to dropped off the map for a couple days. After day two we started to get concerned and to be honest, we were feeling impatient and wanted this to happen NOW (we both have severe FOMO), so we decided to reach out to some of the other people we liked.

We sent messages to several people the next day, which in hindsight, wasn’t a great move - more on that in a minute. We did have one reach back immediately, and she was excellent at communicating, thoughtful, responsive, and seemed to be what we were looking for. We decided to move forward with her screening and sent a deposit to book her. We figured we were all set and started getting excited.

THEN, the original escort reached back out, apologized for unplugging all weekend (it was a holiday after all), and wanted to continue the conversation. Well, shit. It’s amazing the amount of social pressure we felt considering we didn’t know this person at all. However, if we're being honest, this was the person HUSBAND was more interested in, and when we started to talk about that, WIFE said, fuck it, let’s book both.

So, long story short, we are now scheduled with TWO escorts about four days apart. It still feels like living in an alternate reality. Yes, it is a lot of money, but we went into this intending to have an ultimate shared experience that would bring us closer (and provide a lot of pleasure). So we figured, why not try it twice… you know, to see if we really like it!

A few details in case people want to know:Each escort is in the two hours for $1500-$2000 range. Yes, that is baller money, no we are not trying to be Elliott Spitzer, but we did want a top-tier experience and we are in a high-cost-of-living area, so we figured we’d invest big up front and see how it goes.

Both are GFE escorts - which we understand to be oral, penetrative sex with a condom, kissing, etc. We have talked A LOT about what we are okay with, and how we would like this to play out. The main thing we hope to avoid is either of us feeling like we are an outsider during any point of the encounter. We both want to be very involved physically. We started by thinking we’d just do oral, but now think we are open to basically doing everything (no anal) and have talked through all the scenarios and what feels right vs. too far. Oh, and we’ve fucked A LOT while we’ve gone through these scenarios, so that’s a bonus.

We thought about going to a local Swingers club, and may still do that, just to experience a group sex environment. We aren’t comfortable with the idea of having sex or exploring with another couple or a single woman in that setting and aren’t totally sure that we’d be willing to fuck in front of people, although WIFE seems pretty into the idea, while HUSBAND is on the fence.

We are getting a fancy-ass hotel for both appointments. We’ve lined up childcare and will make this a romantic experience. We plan to share a glass of wine with our companion, spend two expensive hours doing whatever we can possibly come up with that feels good, have hot reconnect sex, and then go out to dinner (just the two of us) afterward to talk and savor what we experienced.

We are both planning to get Brazilian wax jobs (a first for both of us) leading up to our liaisons, and we are probably going to get pedi/mani together too. Trying to set the stage for us to feel our best and it’s just fun and something we would normally never do for ourselves.

Obviously, this experience is an INVESTMENT for us - time, money, and emotional energy. We are fortunate to be able to swing it and are also big on prioritizing experiences and things that bring us closer as a couple, so strangely, this all felt in line with our values. We still can’t believe it’s happening though.

We have both had plenty of feelings throughout the last week while we set all this up. Mostly good, but some difficult. We talk A LOT and realized after reading so much advice from others, that this would be a key part of ensuring this is a positive experience for all involved. Obviously, getting into threesome play has the potential to bring forward a host of insecurities in both of us. We’d be happy to share specifics about some of the things that have come up for us and how we worked through them if there’s interest.

Lastly, thank you to all the members of this sub (as well as r/swingers and r/sexworkers who’ve posted questions and advice that have been so helpful to us as we figure out what to do and how to do it.We are planning to post again following our Brazilians, before our liaisons to share how the final few days have felt.

And of course, following our debauchery, we’ll report back with all the details and our final thoughts!