i feel like i haven’t been able to catch a break in like a year. it’s been one thing after another. right now my breaking point feels so dumb, but i’m on a trip visiting one of my friends family’s with another friend, and i got covid. on a remote lil island in alaska. so i’m staying on a boat to quarantine. it smells like dust. my friends are having fun. it’s hot and the bathroom is a super long walk away. and it’s not their fault at all, but it sucks so much.

i just feel like so many bad things have been happening to me that i must have done something to deserve it. i can’t think of anything but maybe i’m making up for whatever bad things i did when i was a kid or whatever, or maybe past lives are real and i’m repenting. idk. i’m so frustrated and sad and just don’t understand why i can’t catch a break. this was supposed to be my break. instead i’m more miserable than i was at home.