I always seem to be the one reaching out when it comes to my oldest friends. If I don't I'd be forgotten or an occasional thought. I don't have best friends anymore they ditched me, we were a trio and I've realised how lonely I've become without having primary people in my life anymore that you speak to on a daily or every few days basis. Just someone you can talk to about something that happened that day, good news or a meme. Anytime I do get the rare message I get so surprised and elated. But I'm realising without my efforts we probably would have faded into acquaintances by now. I have made the effort to make more friends this year and I have but those will take time to develop and create history. I'm at a bit of a loss regarding what to do. Because obviously I can't expect my friends to suddenly become primary people in my life but it hurts to see them hang out with eachother without me. The whole group don't exclude me but they do things or catch up in pairs. I feel really lame, disheartened and unwanted.