First the basics about me. I’m a single (but non-monogamous) white male Dom, sadistic, six feet tall, brown hair, glasses, short beard, and a little overweight. I’m very active and dropping the last few pounds I gained in graduate school. I’m an independent and introverted person with a flexible schedule, I own my house and live alone with my dog in a quiet neighborhood of south St. Louis. I enjoy art, music (especially EDM and festivals), reading, staying active (resistance training, running, skiing, hiking, swimming), cooking, love science fiction, and recently got back into making art… but that’s just a laundry list of topics to start a conversation, to get to know each other.

I’m primarily looking for a masochistic play partner, friend-with-submissive-benefits, kind of person in my life. Especially someone interested in rough sex, submission, bondage (leather and rope), impact, and electrical. I love the mental side of BDSM, objectification, degradation, though those things I’d rather discuss in person after playing a few times. I’m usually attracted to women that are a bit younger and smaller than me. I want a BDSM centered relationship right now, though some connection and attraction outside of kink is necessary. Ideally good conversation and the occasional adventure outside my playroom. . I like people with a strong sense of self, those who know who they are, what they believe, and what they want out of life. I’m open to many levels of relationship, though I’m not looking for a heavy commitment or romance: I plan on traveling a lot starting in the fall with the goal of finding a new city to live in. We can see where it goes.

I am also open to platonic rope practice partners. Though I’ve taken hundreds of hours of lessons, traveled for workshops, and done countless suspension scenes I am rusty as my more recent partners weren’t into it. Though I am a very skilled and knowledgeable rigger, I need to get some of my technique back before I would consider really involved or “hardcore” rope scenes. Though I’m open to people with a wide variety of body types, if the only thing you’re looking for is to get tied with your clothes on then please have some level of fitness and athletic ability.

I’m open to people of all experience levels. What matters to me is knowing yourself: what you’re interested in, what you’re ready for, and the ability to negotiate before and communicate after a scene. My BDSM ethics go beyond enthusiastic consent. I believe that a bottom should have the same education and understanding of safety and technique, that a submissive should be encouraged to step out of the role and dig into understanding it. As a Dom I don’t just want to know I’m allowed to do a thing, but also that it isn’t a wrong or bad thing for my partner.

There are many kinds of submissives, just as there are many kinds of Doms. My interests lean more toward the human pet, slave, and subservient toy end of the spectrum. My past D/s relationships were more DD/lg, and while I enjoy tapping into that side it’s not something I want as a focus. I like to use a mixture of strictness, orders, encouragement, and playful fun in my play. It can range from brutal uncaring sadism to silly sensory exploration. Whatever we fall into, I am primarily interested in play that involves sex in some way.

Message me with a bit about yourself in and outside kink, and a brief description or picture. I’m happy to exchange some messages for a bit, though I find it much easier to get to know someone in person and would want to meet in public fairly quickly.