It's been extremely rough the last few hours. I was able to have a talk last night with my girlfriend about how I feel this is impacting us, myself and how I need to do this. We talked and found some triggers together which helped me find some more on my own however this morning getting up for work I was blind sided. She left my favorite trigger on my work clothes...(accidentally) I caught myself right before release and I felt like shit, absolute trash because I still felt good you know and got dopamine. However I feel through my sleep deprivation a little bit more happy and calm. My body is all out of wack but my mind is stable for the moment.