Story time… so my ex girlfriend and i broke up nearly 2 months ago. Today would have been 5 years. We met in college on our first week and by the 3rd week she wanted to get engaged. I was 23 and she was 18. I know it’s a big gap. She is so beautiful and I knew she was the one, my soulmate. Everything was perfect and we just clicked. We bonded over our mental illness that we had in common and had fun dates. I think this is where the love bombing happened. She was miserable cause college stressed her out and it wasn’t for her. she decided she wanted to go back to her hometown, but didn’t want to leave me. She wanted me to go with her. So I said fuck it lets both go. I left all of my friends and family back home to start a life with her. I got a job and held it down for a year before she finally got one. I always supported her in all her goals and dreams. I saw her growth in our relationship. We were always about healing and growth. I decided to go back to school and pick up a second stream of income. I started investing. Now after a few moves around the city we finally settled at a really good apartment for a good price. We had our ups and downs, but we talked through them and resolved them. I admit we got a bit comfortable, also because of the pandemic, but we tried our best to do something every weekend and celebrated the holidays.

Anyways, someone at her job wanted her number and she gave it to him. She came home that day saying some guy asked for her number and that I shouldn’t be insecure because she told him she had a fiancé. I told her to delete the number and she said she did. Later on i found out that she changed it under a different name. I I didn’t connect the dots until after our break up. I’m not sure if they’ve been talking behind my back through social media but I trusted her enough to not look through her phone. Anyways, we have the entire summer off so we planned to go on vacation and see loved ones. I suggested we take a week apart to ourselves to be with family. Mind you I brought this up a couple of times that year because I felt like I didn’t have an identity or felt suffocated since we haven’t been aprt from each other literally since we met. She did not take that lightly and was upset both times until she finally understood when we had a calm conversation about. After the week we hung out for a day. That day we got buzzed and had an argument. I was fed up, we broke up and got back together that same night. That was the first time we did that and I initiated it. I regret it and let her know how much I do.

After our break up I found out that she hung out with that same person from her work a few days before the break up. She posted him on IG with hearts around his face and quickly took it down one hour later. We talked on the phone and she started asking about the money from my investments and when i refused she started accusing me of some wild allegations. She tried manipulating me into admitting to things I never did. A couple of days after hanging out with him she broke up with me. Her excuse was that there were a lot of problems in our relationship and we have a lot of trauma. She said this break up is for us to heal apart. She wanted to keep the lines of communication open and wanted to do couples therapy. Later on I found out that she had sex with some random guy she met during vacation and was going left and right just collecting numbers from guys.

When we met back up where we both live she spent the weekend in our apartment before she moved out. We had sex that weekend and she started blaming me for her “UTI” when I believe it to have been bacterial vaginosis. She got a yeast infection after too. I told her I need to know if you’re fucking around or dating someone else because I don’t want to catch anything. After that she blamed me for that and then started blaming the break up on me just knit picking all the things we had resolved already. She kept hiding things from me and I had to find out myself. She wasn’t being honest about healing and wanting to come back and build a better foundation for our relationship. I don’t mind if she wanted to be single all i wanted was clarity about her true intentions. She kept hanging out with the same person and telling me that she went out with the girls or went on a girls empowerment trip. She finally admitted that she started talking to him. I wanted to know why she kept speaking to him during our relationship and now broke up with me and moved on quick to him. Also if she ever loved me since she had sex with someone not even a week after our relationship ship ended. She would just get angry and lie to me about all of it. Throughout the last several weeks she had been setting me up to admit to something I never did and filed a temporary restraining order. It was also used to get out of the lease. We are currently going to a hearing soon.

Getting over her has been really tough. I keep thinking about all of the times she had sex with a stranger or with her person. It’s really messing with my self esteem. I can’t stop thinking about her. I still love her even through all the stress she’s putting me in. It felt like She discarded me like nothing and out of nowhere. Yeah we had some issues but not big enough to end an engagement. We were suppose to be ride or die and work through things because we loved each other and wanted to start a family together. We were one year away from that being a reality. Now she is very angry with me a so are the people in her inner circle. Now Im alone in then same place we live. Im completely isolated. Am I dealing with a narcissist?? The whole love bombing and smear campaign point me to It.