This is the first time I've ever gotten an F in a class. For all my life, I've always been the "super smart" kid of the class, but this year, I took the hardest classes I could, and now, I am failing. My grades are slowly rising, but I am still failing AP World History. I just cannot raise my grade for AP World, I have an F. I've been getting more and more depressed everyday, and the mental breakdowns are occurring very frequently, some even during school. I cannot live like this anymore, I am suffering mentally and emotionally. My dad is stressing me out and urging me to raise my grade, because he says if i don't raise my grades i wont ever go to college. I am getting very depressed, I want to be happy and have a good life(fuck im crying right now). I look up to my best friend. He is the reason I took all those classes. I want to be like him, but I just cannot reach his level. I hate myself for doing this to myself. This is all my fault, I'm not trying hard enough, but I just can't anymore, its so fucking demotivating to try to work hard on something, feel like its actually helping me, then just have it all fall in front of me. I fucking hate myself. This is truly the worst place I've ever been in my life. I never imagined I would be in this situation. I don't want to go on, I feel so lonely. I hate my life. TL;DR: My life is going to shit, and I just can't go on anymore.