It was time. Chi and Skully were going to the pub for a well-deserved break. Canvassing the vast swathes of Surrey is thirsty work and every trooper needs their fuel. After the disastrous murder of the pubs, the boys needed to go underground. Deep underground. In the murky cellars of Guildford was a sleeping giant, a resistance movement, a thorn in the side of the red pints. An underground pub. One that was still free, in the hands of a private individual, not the clutches of the government.

Chi rapped his hoofes on the bar. 2 pints of Carling. The lovely orange gold squirted out of the tap and filled up the glass. The boys took a big long slurp. They looked around, the watering hole was filled with those the government had fucked over in recent months, a newly qualified surgeon, Phil Foden, a collection of Foreign diplomats fearing expulsion. All of these people had suffered at the hands of the Rose government. Livelihoods and security dashed into a million pieces in the quest for true “socialism”. Nothing had proved that socialism is when the government does stuff more than this government. Yes they had done stuff, was it good? Not at all. Were we a socialist country? Still not yet. Instead we were in a weird quagmire between socialist and screwed and Tory and less screwed.

The less screwed option gave these individuals back their lives. It championed talented individuals, allowed sportsmen to compete without complicating politics, and respected international law. The Rose Government could learn a thing or two about the less screwed option. After all, they look after their own every time. Look at the former Transport Secretary for example. They got an honour for breaking CCR - twice, while other members of the government who did much more important and influential work got snubbed. Rose was looking after its future, nothing else. These aren’t the people we can have running the country. It simply won’t do.

Chi and Skully went to leave, preparing to bang down every door in Guildford. Chi looked to the sullen crowd, “Chin up boys, the radical left will be on the back foot once again soon.”