Hi all, A few months back I developed psychosis for the first time.

I am a lover of MDMA, it was my comfort drug.

I smoked some bad weed in December which caused me very bad panic attacks, prior to this weed I had no issue with it. However it triggered loops, extreme paranoia that someone was out to get me. Or the authorities were out to get me due to smoking a bit of weed in the back yard or something. ( extreme I know )

Anyways start of this year I had some Mandy, a few weeks later I got auditory hallucinations before I slept for about 2 weeks straight.

I didn’t know what was happening and I was genuinely tweaking. I lost so much sleep and I did have a lot of stress going on in my life.

I went to the doctor as I thought it was an anxiety issue ( I have anxiety and depression and I’ve been unmedicated for years )

I was prescribed probably the worst antidepressant I’ve taken in my life ( Lexapro ) I took it the day after having a very small amount of mdma as well as weed and it sent me into a full psychotic episode.

I was playing gta, I felt my whole body heat up like it was on fire, my vision was flashing, my heart rate was about 110 when I checked. I told my partner we needed to go to the hospital. On the way there I kept hearing the sirens from cop cars ( from gta ) for about 20 minutes.

I lost control of my hands and they ceased up and I could not move them. My vision was flashing white flashes and I genuinely thought I was going to die.

I thought for days on end someone was out to get me. This someone you may ask? I’ve got no damn idea.

I’m now medicated and I feel better ( olanzapine & Sertraline )

I want to ween off it for an event we have coming up to do mdma just one last time.

I am nervous about the psychotic episode happening again and I do not plan to touch weed this time.

I need help to know if it was the weed that caused or or mdma. Keep in mind I’ve never had a bad experience on mdma and I’ve had my fair share of taking the drug.

I hope someone who has been in a similar boat can shed some light.

I do want to do it one last time and call it quits because I do miss that feeling and it’s hard when my partner takes stuff but due to my medications I can’t really do it anymore so I guess I do feel left out.