I (28F) have been dating my bf (29M) for a year now. I’ve always been curious about the idea of an open relationship so I discussed trying it out with my him. I have an easier time finding dates on dating apps so I had 2 dates within a week of opening our relationship. I did not sleep with any of the dates, but I saw how these dates were negatively affecting my partner. We agreed to slow things down and that I would pause on dating to let him ‘catch up.’ He recently went on a date with someone and I gave him full permission to have sex, not thinking that he’d actually do it. I just found out that he did sleep with her and now I’m pretty devastated. I feel betrayed and disgusted, but also feel like I don’t have the right to feel this way because I started this whole thing. Advice on how to move past these feelings? I am now very unsure if ENM is for me.