I (46m) lost my husband 7 years ago shortly before I turned 40. He was 34 at the time. We were together nearly 15 yeara. I do not find the circumstances of his death, nor death itself funny. But with that being said, we always loved through laughter. He was so funny and I loved making him laugh. It was something we did daily. When he unexpectedly died, I was obviously devastated, but I knew he'd want me to laugh again at some point. He was also constantly late to everything. All the time, daily, and he ALWAYS blamed me for it. (I'm never late!). Here's where I may be the asshole... talking to someone shortly after he passed that he used to work with, we were discussing how their job just gave up and accepted he would always be late. I started to repeat something I'd heard my whole life "he'd be late to his own funeral". And it just hit me it was the one time he wasn't late! So I started busting out laughing and said "I'd say he'd be late to his own funeral, but it was the one time he was early in his whole life!". She was appalled and I laughed so hard I cried. He would have found that HILARIOUS. That was just our humor, and to make light of a serious situation to help cope with it. I have told that "joke" several times over the last 7 years, and I still find it funny. Am I the asshole for making jokes?