I am not the original poster. Originally posted by u/Patchwork_purplemoon on r/AmItheAsshole.

​

AITA for telling my aunt she wasn’t allowed to see my newborn (15 Jun 2022)

For my (20f) entire pregnancy my aunt A (43f) would make snide comments toward me and my fiancé (22m) about how we “aren’t fit to be parents” with our “outrageous lifestyle”.

We life in a camper on my mom and stepdads property that is our temporary home and it’s fully furnished with a working kitchen and bathroom (we’re also a little bit on the hippie side of life). She would say she was surprised that my fiancé managed to get me pregnant since he isn’t “very much of a man” (we share clothes)She would also make fun of my weight gain saying she could barely see my belly with all the fat (I’m a pretty small woman I think) and that eating for two isn’t meant to be taken seriously.

I tried to be kind to her in the beginning months of pregnancy because she had suffered through two miscarriages before I got pregnant. My fiancé has never been open about her being hurtful toward me and wouldn’t let me write it off as her being upset over losing her babies and I needed to set clear boundaries so I did, and told her she couldn’t see the baby without my permission.

My aunt also has a history of breaking boundaries and calling cps on family members because they don’t have the same ideals that she does. Well, I just had baby a month ago and finally felt well enough to visit family. I have a rough relationship to my bio dads side of the family and I’m truly only close with my grandparents and siblings. so this past Sunday I decided I was going to take my baby to my grandparents house so they could meet their great grand baby.

I had informed my grandma that I didn’t want to see aunt A and she obliged, only telling a few closer relatives that I was bringing baby over ( Aunt c and her children) in attempt to keep it a secret from aunt A. We had a great time and took many pictures with my family and baby.

Here’s where things get bad, my grandma had posted a picture on Facebook of her holding baby (she had full permission) and my aunt A had seen it despite not using Facebook for years and within the hour had showed up at my grandmas house wanting to see baby. I told her that she could leave and just because she was family she does not have the right to see my baby since she had been so disrespectful toward me and my fiancé. My cousin and my fiancé immediately put themselves between her and I to try and talk her down from her rage and I could remove myself and baby from the room. My fiancé managed to get my aunt A and her children out of the house so we could leave. I got a text from one of my older cousins who was on my side during the fight saying that I should have just let aunt A see the baby so the afternoon didn’t get ruined. So aita?

Verdict: NTA

​

UPDATE: AITA for not letting my aunt see my newborn (6 Jan 2023)

you can the original post here It’s been around 6 months since the incident and I wish a had a happier update, my aunt has still not taken the hint that I don’t want her to be around my child or my fiancé at all. I respect my grandparents choice to allow her over to their house for holidays and still attend the get- together despite knowing she’ll be there.

I still think I’m being a little ridiculous until she goes and tries to grab baby out of the high chair or car seat without permission and it drives me insane. This whole situation has driven a wedge in my family, half of them believe I’m being selfish for not just allowing her to even hold the baby and the other half have constantly had problems with her and completely agree with me.

She has suffered another miscarriage in the last six months and I’m very sorry this is happening to her but I can’t put my baby in contact with her anymore so I’ve decided to keep my distance at holidays and get togethers, we attended Christmas at my grandmas until she showed up with her kids in tow to get ahold of baby any way possible.

I invited her over Today at my grandmas to speak with her without baby, and it went horribly. When she comes in she sees my fiancé and I and then Immediately notices that we don’t have the baby and she flips her lid yelling at us like we’re children because we “tricked” her into coming there only to not bring the baby. My fiancé started the conversation only to be yelled at and called many names by my aunt, she runs away crying into the kitchen like we had done something to her.

I followed her in and lectured her through her crying, telling her that her behavior at the moment was the exact reason she was not allowed to be around our baby and if she was going to continue to belittle us on our lifestyle and parenting she would never see baby again. It felt silly to be lecturing someone 20 years my senior while she cried like a child.

We left without saying anything else and I held my tears in until we reached the car and sobbed the rest of the way home in the comfort of my fiancé.

That was hours ago at this point and I still feel a little silly for how I’m acting even though my aunt had shown how unstable she was to me today. But I don’t want this to drive an even bigger wedge in my family.

Editors Note: I am marking this as "Inconclusive" since it sounds like the issue with the aunt has not been solved at all.

Reminder: I am not the original poster. Originally posted by u/Patchwork_purplemoon on r/AmItheAsshole.