Context: got dumped today.

Friends, some of you have known me over a year. Seen me go through a lot. I guess I just need to touch base. How do I describe this question thoroughly enough...

Do you believe there's an amount of pain that makes seeking vengeance inevitable? Not against anyone in particular, just, the world?

Can you experience so much that justification of your actions loses all meaning, and what's left is your id's mad scramble to bite and claw at everything that makes it feel cornered?

Is there relief in giving in to that? Would I feel like I proved my point?

Would everyone look out into the night in fear, knowing that some hurt thing might be lurking? Would I enjoy that? God I think I would. Is that a dream that's going to break my heart too? Wishing to be the terror I cannot be? And instead only finding want and loneliness.

Is that the curse at the end of the black rainbow? Or is there quenching? Is becoming a monster worth it?