I've never written one of these before, so bare with me. I made a friend with a client at work about a month ago, online where he recognized me first and then in real life. This guy was around through me losing my boyfriend in a gross breakup where I lost my cat. Just to set the scene, I was in a transitional stage.

One night while we're sharing adult substances he asks how "over it" I am, and after I said like 75%, he asked to go on a date with me, I say yes because I was excited. Mind you, later he discloses he plans on waiting to go on a date until a death anniversary passes. I get it, the holidays suck, but he won't tell me what day or when I can wait for.

Now, I'll be real. I slept with him. Multiple times. I stayed at his house one night after drinking too much as well and he didn't touch me. He took care of me when he was sweet. One day he gets sick and doesn't message back all day, so I figure that's what I should expect , radio silence. Come the next day, Sunday, and I haven't heard from him yet nor do I expect to. What do I do? I see a friend, an adult one, besides him.

So this is where it gets complicated. I had already slept with this other guy before I ever slept with who this post is about, so its not really like anyone is exposed to anything new besides the guy friend I visited that wasn't sick. After I left guy #2's house, potential suitor messages me asking what I'm doing. I tell him I just left a friend's house. He doesn't like that.

He goes into a frenzy about how he doesn't feel clean and needs to go get tested. Also he's not going to date me anymore, he's a hair from ghosting me, and he'll never be my customer again. All the while not directly calling me a hoe, but telling me I'm a liar and giving me the definition of what he thinks a hoe is.

So to break it down, he slut shamed me, misgendered me, belittled me, and called me names. What did I do? Nothing new I guess. Am I the asshole for not being committed to someone brand new.