Edit: I think I used the word “push” incorrectly although maybe not. I want us both to go back, she still fantasizes about things every now and again and so do I. Also, I never wanted to have “activities” without her involved, that is part of the kink. Finally, we both had the same amount of partners and experiences, so I wasn’t the only one doing things. But y’all are right overall, it did hurt her and although I really liked the experiences it should NEVER overshadowed her in pain and I should of stuck up for our marriage. Thank yall!

My wife (39F) and I (40M) were dating other people for a little over a year and a half, ethical non-monogamy (ENM). We had one serious relationship with another couple and dated for about 8 months. It ended very badly, I treated my wife horribly because I thought she was being jealous, manipulative and treating me like a punching bad, when in her eyes she was protecting me from a horrible woman (my gf at the time). My wife’s relationship with the other man went downhill fast (he was a pushover and his wife basically told him to stay away from her). Between me being an ass to my wife and him dumping her, she was hurt badly and wanted us out of ENM for good. Which we have done for the past year and a half. The problem is… I loved the lifestyle and loved having adventures with random strangers, I would go back in a heartbeat. AITAH for wanting to push my wife to go back into it?